Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

Hot hot hot

Posted: May 29, 2008 in Uncategorized

it’s dazzlingly hot. I thought the clouds were coming in and it would gert cooler, but no, the opposite. Not much sense of the ticking clock here (sitting on the steps by the boathouse above the beach).

I have 60 hours to go till midnight 31st May. I have nearly finished puting up the pages for Season 1 of and have come to a halt. I can’t find the next notebook bit to type up. I have notebooks going back 10 -15 years, all labelled and some indexed. there’s an enormous pile of stuff there. there’s an enormous pile of stuff in the room.

(I may upload photos but that would involve finding the camera and all its bits)

The big shelf fell down in th emiddle of the BIG SORT-OUT and I haven’t really recovered since. I just shift the piles around and when I run out of clean knickers (I have about a month’s supply) I grab armfuls of the topmost pile and do a big wash.

I have creditors battering att he door and tying up my phone line because I can’t find the paperwork to go with their insistent demands and I’m buggered if I’m going to pay them sight unseen – robbing bastards.

So all in a ll a bit of a space crisis.

Which is why I’m sitting  here on the steps watching the tide scoop up brown ribbons of weed like a sinkful of tealeaves.

the Plan is:

Plan A

Find the rest of Season 1, type it up, put it into pages. Then Upload the whole of Season 1 to, by tonight.

plan B

Start typing up Season 2, create a database of Season 2 diaries, and start putting them into pages; <br />Break occasionally to search for the missing notebook and tidy up.

plan C – sod it! Who needs money anyway?

Plan C is looking very goos from here

4 days to go. 100 hours. I have just started on the section ‘Where we were when’ about 7/7/05 – the London bombings.

How weird is it that as I type up from my handwritten notebook words that I myself put in the mouths of imaginary characters, I’m streaming tears? It’s not true. I made it up. These are imaginary people. I can sort-of see it, with someone else’s words, but one’s own? How do you suspend your disbelief when you are the one making it up? It’s a marvellous thing the human mind, it has infinite capacities to distract. Even with time’s winged chariot bearing down

You tend to think of imagination as ethereal, airy, effortless like day-dreaming. So I am always surprised when I visualise, say, a book or deliberately create a scene in my imagination, that it is far from effortless. It’s work and I feel exhausted by the effort. What is going on? Why does it feel like that?

Why is one type of imagination – dreaming, day-dreaming, mind-wandering – so weightless, and the other strenuous? The brain uses a hugely disproportionate amount of the body’s oxygen and energy. What is this brainwork?

The best way I can understand it is to imagine a cart on a bumpy surface. If the wheels get caught in a rut where previous carts have gone before, then there’s very little effort to keep it on that patth, and gravity will help out. But every effort to direct it along new lines that you choose, amking a new path, takes energy, will, concentration.

Someone compared the relation of reason to emotion to that of a small man riding an elephant. If you can get the elephant to go your way, you’re unstoppable, but to get it to go where it doesn’t want to, you’ve got a real job on your hands.

So when you are day-dreaming, the elephant is wandering where it will. You may, as rartional creative driver, notice this is a good route or good up to this point before it veers off…

ironically, as I wrote that, my attention wandered all over the place. I can’t even track it: future-past-future-present-past, round the houses, of course there was sex involved. That’s the wandering elephant for you. But the effort of getting it back on track! 

to clear my head

Posted: May 26, 2008 in Uncategorized
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My head is very full of politics, debate, stuff. All the stuff about the state…

I was thinking there’s something very concrete box-y about the space. Is there any way of getting more growing things in there? Or site-specific artworks? The portential for this space as a meeting place for the alternative…

I wonder if I should go for a walk on the beach to clear my head…

Later: I am out for two hours. I write some notes for a political blog. I come home and make a cooked breakfast, then go out to Projectile.

short shrift

Posted: May 25, 2008 in Uncategorized
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the early hours are the best time  to get ideas. today I am much occupied with ‘short shrift’. Where does the phrase come from. What is ‘shrift’? Is it the past tense of ‘shrive’. If so, is ‘shift’ the past participle of ‘shive’ – as in ‘tut and shive’ which is I believe a pub name?

|I reach for the dictionary which happens to be by my bed.

Shrift: (orig) penance, absolution, confession.

short shrift: short time for confession before execution. summary treatment of a person or matter.

Shift: …(OE sciften – to divide, allot)

Shive: a slice (of bread), a thin cork or bung

So, yes, shrift has a similar relation to shrive as shift has to shive, or perhaps a mirror image.

I have just done a shift at Projectile, pulling pints and heating pasties (wholemeal, veggie). I’m sure I had recourse to a shive – whether on the barrel, or the plate. But I haven short shrift to chz-swann

a lesson in consistency

Posted: May 24, 2008 in Uncategorized

Having decided, on Saturday, that I need to document my ninsanely short schedule for posting two seasons of content on, I promptly take myself off for a volunteer shift at Projectile, the anarchist film festival. Consistency never been my strong suit